Adidas miCoach

I have a new obsession.  My husband bought an Adidas miCoach maybe 2 months ago - it's a tracking device that fits in his soccer cleats and tracks his movements.  It shows you how far you've run, how fast, how many calories you've burned and what percentage was a jog, run or walk.  It's a pretty amazing little gizmo.  Leo Messi from FC Barcelona also wears one - and my husband is obsessed with him and his team.

Last week my husband convinced me to get my own, so I did.  I've been running toward a goal at the gym, I got myself able to run just 1 lap, all the way to 25!  I decided that after I hit 25, I'd work on my speed.  I have to have goals otherwise I am just running in circles.  I achieved my first goal of 25 laps last week and I was elated!  Who knew I could run that much!  At the gym, the track tells you how many laps = how many km.  According to that, I assumed I was running 3.2 km at at time.  I tried my miCoach for the first time this week, ran my 25 laps and when I got home, I discovered that I had run over 4km!!!  Amazing!

My sweet little husband decided that he wanted me to be able to wear it while I play soccer.  His cleats have a slot for his miCoach because he bought the ones that are compatible, mine weren't.  So he dug a little hole in my insole and sized it for the miCoach.  I played on Saturday, came home and synced the miCoach to find that I had run 7km in the game!  I was so excited!!!  Me, running 7km!!  This from the girl who used to not be able run even if someone were chasing her!

That's not me anymore, obviously, but the changes I've made over the last few years amaze me and I am just so proud of myself.  Not only have I accomplished a lot, I have PROOF!  So if anyone says I should lose weight, I have the proof that I am trying.  If another doctor says that I need to change my lifestyle before he even knows me, I can show him my stats and shove them in his face.  Ok, I got a little excited there.  But I could slap those people that say stuff like that to me.  Not only can I challenge them and threaten to kick their ass, I really can kick their ass!  Take that stupid people!

Back to the miCoach - it is an addictive little tool.  Every time I wear it, I am always thinking about it and how much more can I run, how fast can I run?  By the way - at the gym I clocked myself at just over 15km/hr and at my game, I hit 18.68km/hr!!!  Now all I can think about it beating that!  Myself and I have a really heavy competition on now!  It's really exciting to see what my body can do, and then see how I can beat my own times.

I have to take a day off today - I ran 3 days straight and my feet are killing me.  But tomorrow, I'd better watch out, I am going to kick my own ass again!

Why do women compare themselves to models in magazines?

I am not gorgeous, I am not thin or beautiful, I do not have long legs, long hair or a flat stomach.

I have a (very) curvy body, (fat) muscular calves that have a hard time finding shin pads to fit.  I have a big butt that I am proud of, I am attractive, I have a belly that held 2 children, and some days it looks like one is still in there.  I have wiggly arms, wiggly inner thighs and yet, when I look in the mirror, I see a lovely woman.

I am kind and loving, loyal, determined, I work my ass off at the gym, I run my ass off on the soccer field.  I have a husband who adores me and 2 amazing kids that think I am the best Mom in the world.

Those models in the magazines should be comparing themselves to me, and maybe they do.  What do they have?  Yes they are beautiful, but remember, they are people too.  Beauty is their job - does it make them happy?  Maybe yes, maybe no.  They get pimples, they have bad days, they have hard times in relationships.

Those models that you compare yourself to - they are judged every single day about how they look.  I don't have to worry about that.  Those models have to watch what they eat, worry if they get a pimple, worry if they gain weight, worry about the next model that is just waiting to take their place.  I am not envious of them, that can't be easy.

My life - there's no one that can take my place - my kids and husband will attest to that.  I don't care if I gain 5 pounds, I'd rather lose 5, but it won't affect my life either way.  I get pimples, I have bad hair days, and I just laugh along with the people like me who make fun of me for it.

You can't compare yourself to anyone else.  Take the time to see what you have to offer, what your great qualities are.  Tell yourself that you are beautiful and wonderful until YOU believe it.  Make the decision to have good self esteem, and remind yourself to work on it.  I say, fake it til you make it!  That's what I did.

I went a little overboard and I am a tad bit egotistical.  But that's ok - I'm awesome.  I just wish I could make the women of the world understand that they are wonderful just the way they are.  The men too.  Stop comparing yourself to other people and work on yourself.  I have nothing that other people don't have - except the knowledge that I am great, just the way I am.  Take a page from the "Book of Pam" and love yourself - that is always the first step.

As a side note, I played my first game of outdoor soccer for the season last night.  I was sooo nervous, but I did great.  We won, but best of all, I felt great just being there.  Do something for you - you're worth it. (that sounds cheesy as I read it, but it's true, and I can be cheesy if I want to be!)

Why does it surprise me when my kids surprise me?

Yesterday was a very long day.  My son had a soccer game that he and my husband went to, my daughter and I were going to watch a bit before we had to leave for her game.  My daughter's coach called and said that he was sick - could I fill in for him?  Being the assistant coach and really wanting to coach, I said yes.  We had to skip my son's game, we picked up the soccer balls from the coach's house, ran up to the field, which turned out to be the wrong field and got over to the right field just a few minutes before game time.

I am going to skip over the game for now and get on with the rest of the day.  My husband showed up for my daughter's game, after the game, he took the kids home so he could go to practice and I left after the game to get to my practice.  After my practice, I had a party to go to, showed up all gross and sweaty, hung out for an hour and left to get the family some Chinese food.  I got home, we watched "The boy in the Striped Pyjamas" and held my daughter on the couch as she cried her eyes out over the movie.  She was horrified by it and understood way too much of what happened.  We have told her all about that time of war, so she knew, but that movie just made it very real.  I could go on about that, but it makes me cry and I have a different story to tell.

Back to my daughter's game.  Her team is new, they haven't had much time together and they have tied one game and lost 2.  We have a girl that plays in net, but only for half the game.  Another girl volunteered once and was then on deemed the back up goalie, even though she didn't want to be.  The other day, my daughter decided, she was going to be in net for yesterday's game.  I asked if she was sure, and she was adamant.  She's never had a desire to be goalie, so I was a bit surprised.  The big shock of the day - she was AMAZING!!!  Man that kid can kick a ball!  She made at least 15 saves, she did let in 3 goals, but as it was her first time ever in net, I let that slide.  She dove for the ball, she challenged and she can kick to ball to the centre line every time!  The first time she did a goal kick, everyone on our team, who was on the sideline, including the other assistant coach, their jaws dropped.  The assistant coach exclaimed, she's got a kick on her.  Yes, yes she does.

My daughter, who has had a full half hour of goalie training, is now the goalie extraordinaire!  I really wouldn't have believed it if I had not seen it with my own eyes.  It's not that I didn't think she could do it, I just didn't think she wanted to.  These kids, they surprise me like that all the time.  I am very biased, we all know that I think my kids are amazing, but even I was blown away at how amazing they can be.  Why does it surprise me that I am surprised?  I should just expect that they will shock me like that from time to time, but I have no idea when they are going to do it.  I made some pretty amazing kids!

I guess that this is my Mother's day post, and how fitting.  I am so thankful that I have been blessed with such wonderful children.  It is my honour to be their Mother, and they make me proud every where they go.  They make me look like the best Mother in the world!

Happy Mother's Day!

2 in one day!

I was out all day delivering brochures for my soccer team to schools in the SW area of Calgary.  It was a lot of in and out of the car, and lots of counting!  It wasn't that bad though, I got to listen to music all day, saw some new places in the city and was very thankful that my kids go to such a great school.  Some of the schools I saw were nice, some were not, and some, the staff were a bit crabby.  Not to say that our school is the best - but we do love it.

I also had a lot of time to think today.  I like to volunteer my time and I realized one of the reason's why.  I really like that feeling that I belong to something, a family, a group of friends, a soccer team.  It makes me feel like I am part of something that is bigger than I am.  It makes me feels useful, needed and wanted.  That's a great feeling.  

I didn't always have that feeling growing up, I always felt like I was just on the outside of a lot of things.  Now I have my beautiful little family whom I adore, a great group of friends and a soccer team that I really enjoy spending time with.  I feel like I found my place in the world.  Volunteering for my soccer club and the school just shows me, and other people, that I belong.  I know that I am the only one that should matter, but after being on the outside for so long, it feels good to know that other's see me as belonging to something.  It's why I wear my soccer jacket every where I go and why I hang out at the school and know most of the kids names.  That is also why I hang out with people that feel the same way.  

It was a long day though.  This week went by really quickly, not like last week, and this day was quick and long all at the same time.  I am going to go put my feet up now and relax for a while.  I have earned it today!

I woke up refreshed this morning! I was shocked!

No is not in my vocabulary

I ended my last post with the notion that I would say no more often.  It didn't work.

I did say no to a lunch with a person that I used to know, but wasn't really friends with and don't really want to bring back into my life.  That was a good start.

Then I went on to say yes to 3 days of volunteering at the school, one full day of delivering for my soccer club, 4 appointments, being an assistant soccer coach for my daughter's team and one full day at home waiting for the gas meter people.  To defend myself, I did make a promise to help out with my soccer club, I love volunteering at the school and the appointments were really needed.  I also have to get my daughter to her games anyway, and I really like being able to have my say in things.

I don't feel bad or resentful for saying yes to these things, so that must mean that it's ok.  Sometimes I am saying yes to things that I really don't want to do, so that's an improvement at least.  I have an awesome reason now to say no - aka the sleep disorder - that gives me an excuse to say no to the things I really just don't want to do, I have a valid reason for saying no, and I don't feel bad about it.  I guess I just need to practice the art of saying no.

I also know that I am the type of person that NEEDS alone time.  As long as I am not overworking myself, going to the gym enough, not feeling run off my feet and getting enough alone time, I am good.  The second that alone time is being compromised, I feel really bitchy!  Then everything else feels like too much.

I have to admit that I have a pretty cushy life - I don't work, but I also just about had a nervous breakdown a few years ago and I need to make sure that I am taking care of myself so that doesn't happen again.  Yes it was extenuating circumstance, but throughout that whole ordeal, I (finally) realized that I don't deal with stress very well.  My family wants and needs me at home, so for now, that is where I sill stay and keep my life as stress free as possible.  AND I am not going to feel bad about that.

Ok, say no to things I don't want to do, keep saying yes to things I like and be low stress - I hope I can manage to do that.