Telephonophobia

I have been looking up the fear of talking on the telephone, and it has a name.  Telephonophobia.  That's so much fun to say!  I do not have this affliction, I thought I might so I looked it up.  Telephonophobia is a reluctance or fear of making or taking phone calls, literally, "fear of telephone(thanks wikipedia).  It would seem that I do have that, but after a quick survey on whether I do or not, I answered too many questions as no, so maybe I just have a reluctance, not an actual phobia.  

Now why on earth am I talking about this?  I guess because it hit me the other day that I was putting off phone calls and actually feeling anxious about making them.  Honestly, I absolutely HATE talking on the phone.  I'm not sure why.  I don't care if I call people at a bad time, I don't worry about awkward pauses, those were some of the questions asked on the questionnaire, and now I can't find it, so I can't tell you what the other things were.  All I remember is that I only answered yes to 2 out of 10.

I can talk to people just fine in person, I can email and text people without issue, it's just the phone.  Sometimes I think that I will get stuck on the phone and won't be able to get off.(which is silly, I can just hang up on people. I don't, but I could.  I can't run away from people in person, I could, but then they might think I need to be institutionalized!) Sometimes talking is just too much effort and I just don't have it in me to be coherent.  I can talk to my husband on the phone without issue, but there have been times that I've told him that I need to get off the phone because I just don't want to talk on the phone anymore.  He loves to talk to me on the phone, it drives me crazy.  I can hardly hear him half the time, and the other half, he has people talking to him in the background or his radar detector is going off in his car.  He has bluetooth and I can hear everything in the car around him...horns honking, wind if the window is open, and sometimes just the static alone makes me want to reach through the phone and punch him.  Instead of doing that, I just make him let me go.  

I am absolutely sure that I don't have this phobia as I spoke on the phone all morning without issue.  I called a bunch of people about a fundraiser, spoke to 3 different people, one for at least a half hour.  I called to book a hotel room for a soccer tournament, I called 311 regarding some vehicles that have been parked on my street for MONTHS, and haven't moved once.  I even answered my cell phone when it rang with an unknown number.  It was a friend calling from her work number, but I didn't know that and answered anyway. I don't normally do that.  At home, when the phone rings, I make other people answer.  I don't answer any calls from 1-888, or 800 numbers, nothing that I think might be a telemarketer.  I will answer calls from RBC, but anything unknown or that I don't recognize, it's going to voicemail.  If it's important, they'll leave a message.  

That all being said, if you call me and I don't answer, its because I am not home, or I really just don't want to talk on the phone.  It's not you, it's me!  If I don't answer, leave a message.  If you don't, I won't call you back.  I'm serious!  (Unless you are my sister, I'll call her back. She already knows I have issues!)  Tell me why you are calling, what exactly do you want from me?  You want to just chat, then don't bother calling, I don't do that. (I will chat for hours in person though) Do you have a question or problem?  Ok, I will talk, but not for too long!  And even then, text me, email me, I answer those really quickly!  I also don't like to call places that have inept people answering their phones.  If you work at that company, know your damn job or don't answer the phone.  (those people I can also handle in person, because I can make the face at them so they know that I think they are inept.)

I think I've said this before, but my time is very precious to me.  I find talking on the phone a huge waste of time and I don't want to do it, and you can't make me!  I really am not trying to be a cow, but I feel very strongly about this topic.  So if I don't like talking on the phone, why make me?  I'm not going to be all that nice to talk to.  Shoot me an email, have a coffee with me, just please, don't call me.