I have been given a diagnosis of Sleep breathing disorder. As I have said a few weeks ago, this is what they thought I had, but now it is confirmed. I also have pathological day sleepiness. The good news in all this is that I will be fitted for a mouth piece that should take care of my problem - and I don't have to wear the dreaded sleep mask - and I have sleeping pills to last me until I get used to that device. The REALLY good news is that I was also prescribed an alerting medication! Otherwise known as legal speed!
I took my first pill this afternoon, right after lunch. I have to admit that I have a bit of a headache, but nothing I can't handle, and I only started yawning at 9pm. Before that I felt...what is the word for it....ah yes, AWAKE! Not high, not crazy energetic or anything, but awake! I felt so good after I saw the doctor that I immediately went to the gym and had a quick run, did some weights, got hit on by a 25 year old guy, and did 200 sit ups! I then went to get my pills, went home, ate lunch, showered and then took my first pill. I didn't need a nap, I didn't think about a nap, I didn't even barely sit down all evening, and it felt great!!! When I did sit down, I didn't get drowsy. When I started to yawn, I didn't feel like I was so desperate for sleep that I felt sick. It was great! I visited with a friend after school, I came home and made supper, I got my daughter back to the school for her band performance, stayed there for 2 hours, came home and walked my Mom's annoying dog, put the kids to bed and wrote this. All that without the desperation (and crankiness) of being sooo tired.
Now that I can be awake, just imagine what I can accomplish! I can clean the house, do errands, get through a day without wasting so much time on the couch sleeping or thinking about when I can get my next "fix"...aka nap. If I can get all that normal and boring stuff done, maybe I can even make some goals and achieve them! I don't want to get too ahead of myself, I know it's just the first day, but I don't waste so much time sleeping, I can actual get stuff done and want to get stuff done. It was such a huge relief getting this diagnosis.
I called my husband after and he was "oh, that's good", and I was annoyed that he didn't understand how HUGE this was for me! So I called my big sister and she yelled and congratulated me like I needed. I felt much better after getting that understanding reaction. Most people just don't know what it's like to be sleep deprived for so long. I thought I'd be ok once the kids started sleeping through the night, like I could get more sleep too. But sleep, good, restful sleep, eluded me for so long.
I feel so hopeful that I will be able to have a life again. I felt literally like a drug addict, and sleeping was my drug, but it never made me feel any better. Now, I am like a drug addict taking my pills to keep me awake and then ones to make me sleep, but I will do anything to get to that point where I have a mouth piece and that does it all for me. It was interesting seeing the results of the sleep study. I even saw the video of me, sleeping in bed and tossing and turning. You can see on the results page where I am asleep, where I gasp for breath, where I wake up - it's all in the brain waves. It's crazy.
This isn't the end of the road yet, I still have to be fitted for the mouth piece, and go back for adjustments. I still have to see the doctor to make sure it's working, and of course I have the pills for now. The diagnosis is the climax of this story and it's all conclusion from here.
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