Honesty - the best policy?

For those of you who know me, I like to be honest. I try not to lie about anything, but sometimes it's really hard to know when people want me to be nice, or if they want me to be honest. So many times I am asked for my opinion, I have to ask if they want me to be honest. They always say yes. Then I ask them again, and remind them that they might not like what they hear. Again, they say yes. Then I give my honest opinion and they look at me like I am evil. I gave them fair warning didn't I?

I always think that being honest is such a good thing, but so many people have such a hard time with it. They don't want to be honest, and they don't want people to be honest with them. They just want people to tell them exactly what they want to hear. Some days I just want to shout at people - yes! Your kid IS too loud, yes, your hair looks stupid, no you didn't get that thing that was hanging out of your nose. It's been there for weeks! I could go on for hours! My Mom once tried on an outfit and I told her she looked like a pear in it. Sure she was hurt, but now she knows that I mean it when I tell her she looks good!

I've been so brutal about making sure my kids know how important honesty is that my son cries if I tell him that I think he is lying. After an incident of lying in grade one, that kid will never lie again.

I find that if you are honest, everyone knows where they stand with you. I'm not saying that I won't be nice to someone that I don't like, but I call that basic civility. Trust me, you'll know if I don't like you! I also will just keep my mouth shut if I don't agree with something - but only if it's none of my business.

With honesty, you always know what is real. Even if that something is really bad, at least you can deal with it. You know what's really happened and you get to make the decision based on that. You get to decide if you are mad, if you can deal with it, if it requires counselling, a hit to the head with a frying pan or just forgiveness. Lying will get you nowhere, no one will ever trust you and it just makes life so much harder.

As a side note, this is not about anything in particular - no one has pissed me off (too much) lately. This subject was just nagging at the back of my brain. If you ever need an honest opinion though- just ask me, but be warned that while you may not like what you hear, at least you know I was being honest!